Waging War On Your Ex

It seems that Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards are going back into court in an attempt to alter their current custody situation. One of the biggest issues that I face from time to time in my practice is when parents wage war on each other in order to "get back" or make the other party pay for past indiscretions. This can happen in the form of denial of visitations, or requesting restricted visitations based on thoughts and fears that children will not be safe if one party is left alone with the children. Often times these fears are unfounded and I have a difficult time balancing the wants of my clients with what I believe is best for their children. These type of situations generally go on for years and years, and resolution almost never happens. When it comes to children and divorce, its important to keep in mind that children generally benefit from having as much substantial contact with both parents, with the exception of situations where one of the parents is physically or mentally abusive, is a criminal or abuses drugs and/or alcohol. I encourage everyone who has difficulties communicating with their ex-spouse about their children to talk with a parenting coordinator who can help the parties create an environment where children don't feel caught in the middle.