Alimony....Till Death Do Us Part?

In a long term marriage, when permanent periodic alimony is a given, we often speculate when someone can retire and possibly eliminate or severely reduce a monthly alimony amount. Often times, if someone retires at a normal retirement age, alimony can be eliminated or reduced at retirement. However, a judge in Massachusetts has ruled that a person may have to continue working or seek part-time employment even after retirement in order to satisfy an alimony obligation. Is this fair? Should someone have to continue to work well into his/her 70s or 80s in order to satisfy an alimony requirement? Shouldn't a person be allowed to retire? On the other hand, should someone be allowed to retire in order to escape the necessity of paying alimony? Alimony is one of those nasty words that causes heartburn for those who have to pay it and heartburn for those who are fearful of losing it. With people living longer and retirement ages still around 65, it'll be interesting to see how all courts handle this complex issue.

To read the article about the Massachusetts ruling see: http://www.boston.com/news/local/massachusetts/articles/2009/11/10/divorce_may_mean_retiring_is_delayed/

Feline and Canine Victims in Divorce

There are always victims of collateral damage in a divorce, and sometimes the victims are the family pets. I have seen couples fight over who is going to get the animals in a divorce and in other circumstances, people decide to give their animals up because there is either too much going on and neither party can take care of them, or it is decided that it is too expensive to continue to care for the pets. If you are thinking about getting a pet and your marriage is in an unstable state, think twice before you make that purchase.

Divorce and Depression

I read an article online about a man in California who murdered his two children and then took his own life. He was going through a divorce and had recently lost his job. From the articles that I read, no one said whether there were signs that this gentleman was depressed, acting unusual or had a violent history. I see many people come through my office who are depressed, angry, lonely, or otherwise not acting like themselves. We in the family law world often say that criminal attorneys get to see bad people at their best and family law attorneys get to see good people at their worst. Its important that you find help if you are struggling with your new life and if you suspect that your soon to be ex-spouse is not emotionally stable. Seek help from local law enforcement and the courts or encourage those members of your family or friends who are struggling with the reality of their divorce to seek help from a mental health professional. Unfortunately tragedies like the one that happened in California may still happen, however, don't be afraid to seek help if you feel that you are emotionally in trouble.

To read the article upon which this blog is based see:

Does A Leopard Change Its Spots?

Every now and then, I come across an article that falls under the title "the truth is stranger than fiction". In Tysons' Corner, Virginia a man has chosen to wear a sandwich board stating that he's a cheater in hopes of winning his wife back after infidelity. Whether or not this is some sort of strange publicity ploy is still up for debate, but its an interesting tactic in winning your spouse back after being unfaithful. I would say that as much as 25% of our divorce clients have dealt with infidelity at some point in their marriage, and I don't think that most of them would take someone back just because they decided to publicly announce to the world that they cheated. Would this work if your spouse had cheated on you? Do you think that it would help your relationship and ensure a better marriage? I'm always interested to hear other people's perspective on the articles that I post to this blog. Let me know if you think that this guy and the parties' marriage has a chance of survival.

Divorce and Naked Pictures

Its no secret that many people do things in their marriages that they don't wish to become part of the public record when they divorce. This can be anything from tax fraud to extramarital affairs. Sometimes things as personal as naked pictures of private videos rear their heads in the midst of divorce to be used as leverage of blackmail. What do you do if your husband or wife threatens to post your private pictures and videos on the Internet for all the world to see? You can certainly file a motion for protective order to stop this from happening, but often times, the damage is done before your motion is even in front of a judge. There is a case here locally that is directly on point on this one, and its still unclear whose side the Judge is going to land. I provide everyone with this advice, be careful what you do even in the privacy of your own home, because you never know when it'll be used against you in a court of law.

To read the article upon which this blog is based, see:

Same Sex Marriage Divorce?

This week I had a question about whether you can divorce in Florida if you were married to your same-sex partner in another state and happened upon a story along the same subject involving Martina Navratilova. Ms. Navratilova is coming under a great deal of scrutiny from the gay community for hiding behind Florida's laws regarding same sex marriage in order to protect her assets. Florida does not recognize civil unions or gay marriages from other states, therefore, if you were married in a state that recognizes gay marriage or civil unions, you are not going to be able to file for a divorce in Florida. The Florida courts cannot dissolve something that the State does not recognize. What are you to do if you were married to your gay partner in another state? I have researched this issue, and unfortunately have not really found anything that could shed light on this topic, but for now, it appears that Florida would not recognize your marriage, therefore, you could not seek a divorce. You could file partition actions to split up joint property, but that may be your only legal remedy. If anyone has any comments or suggestions on this topic, please post your comments here for me to share with the rest of my readers.

http://www.queerty.com/is-martina-navratilova-actually-bad-for-gay-rights-20090630/

The Internet and Divorce

We are definitely in an information age where everyone seems to have a Facebook, MySpace, Twitter or Linked-In Account. I must admit I don't really understand Twitter but I am an actively involved member of the Facebook community. I always tell my clients that email, voicemail as well as Facebook and Myspace postings can all be used against you in a Courtroom, so before you post a status on Facebook or Twitter and before you post those pictures of you partying with your friends on Myspace, remember that all of this media can and often is used against you in Court. Everyone is watching and sometimes that means your soon to be ex spouse. When you are going through a divorce, it is important not to act emotionally, especially in Cyberspace. You never know when something you did impulsively ends up as Petitioner's Exhibit 1.

To read more about the Internet and divorce, see the following article:

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1904147,00.html?iid=tsmodule