Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Should You Stick It Out?

The week after Christmas is historically a very busy year for divorce attorneys as people have gotten their families through the holidays and decide that there is no time like the present to get out of a bad marriage. I've read many articles about how too many couples are throwing in the marriage towel too soon and how more couples should try sticking it out. How do you know if your marriage is worth saving? Unfortunately, as an attorney and not a trained marriage counselor, I don't have an answer to that question. Although, from my experience, once someone has made the decision to seek the counsel of a divorce attorney, the wheels of progress are not often reversed. Knowing when it's "truly over" is trickier than it looks. In The Case for Marriage, Americans Linda J Waite and Maggie Gallagher (Doubleday 2000), quote from the American National Survey of Families and Households in which 86% of unhappily married couples who "stuck it out" found that five years later their marriages were "happier". Only 15% of those who initially said they were unhappily married continued to say their marriages were very unhappy. Whether to stick it out is a personal decision that should not be made lightly.

3 comments:

AntonioFWW said...

I agree, it's totally up the couple. Couseling does help from time to time but many times I think people don't spend enough time before hand getting to know the person before they actually marry.

All my best,
Antonio

Jason and Erin Morrison said...

I just found your blog and I am amazed at the amount of wonderful resources you have provided! I am a recent law school graduate who is looking forward to a career in family law. You are doing a wonderful service to your clients by providing such wonderful information!

Great blog! Keep up the good work!

Anonymous said...

Antonio is right. I fall into the category of "not knowing my partner before we got married." I am finding it harder and harder every day to continue on... although we have children which makes decision making very difficult. I would love advice from anyone who has it.