Special Needs Children, Divorce, And A Race for a Cure

There is plenty of research out there that sets forth very disappointing statistics about couples with special needs children and divorce. Children put strains on even the happiest of marriages. Couples have a much higher likelihood of divorce if they have a special needs child, whether that is a child with mental or emotional special needs or a child that has been diagnosed with a disease such as cancer. There is no question about the devastating effects that the stress involved with caring for a child that has needs above and beyond what is considered "normal" can have on a marriage. Trying to keep things together emotionally and financially when caring for a special needs child can break the proverbial matrimonial back. Perhaps one of the ways that we can focus on keeping families together is getting to the root of diseases such as autism and cancer and doing proactive things to find cures. Perhaps if less pediatric diseases existed, less couples will end up in divorce court. That's why foundations such as Noah's Light Foundation are an essential part of keeping families together. The focus of Noah's Light Foundation is finding a cure for pediatric brain and spinal tumors. Finding a cure for such diseases can have a ripple effect which reduces the divorce rate in this country. While some couples may still end up in divorce court regardless of whether or not their children are healthy, I truly believe that reducing stress in people's lives does increase happiness which ultimately leads to less divorce.

To read more about Noah's Light Foundation, see: http://www.noahslightfoundation.org/

Child Support Changes

A new approach to calculating child support was signed into law in Florida in June and will effect most, if not all, of the cases that are currently pending before the courts. The law goes into effect either in October 1, 2010 or January 1, 2011 and in short, it drastically changes the way in which child support is calculated. It used to be that unless you had your child or children for 40% of the overnights, you did not receive any type of substantial contact credit. That has changed significantly. Once this law goes into effect, anyone who has their child or children for at least 20% of the overnights (every other weekend from Friday to Monday, alternating holidays and 1/2 the summer) will get a substantial contact credit. Additionally, the following changes will be made:

1. A child support order will have to have a specific termination date and have step down child support specified. This means if you have more than one child there will have to be a termination date inserted for after the first child reaches the age of majority, and then a changed amount and a termination date for each child thereafter. (i.e., child support shall be $1,200 per month for three children terminating June 10, 2012, then $900.00 for two children terminating on August 1, 2014 and then $600.00 ending June 10, 2016).
2. Daycare expenses are no longer discounted by 25%. You now will get credit for 100% of your daycare costs, however, the childcare tax credit will be taken into consideration when determining child support.
3. The courts may have the ability to impute income to someone if they don't provide "adequate" financial information in order to calculate child support. What income they can impute is the change, in that, they can automatically impute income to that party to have the income equivalent to the median income of year-round full-time workers as derived from the current population reports or replacement reports published by the United States Bureau of the Census. (If you can figure out what that means, call me.)

In a nutshell, I believe that the legislature is trying to cure the problem of people demanding extra overnights during the week in order to get a substantial contact credit. We'll see if that still makes a difference, but for now, it appears that the way that we calculate child support is going to make some people very happy.

Staying In A Bad Relationship For The Kids

There are many studies that talk about the negative effects that divorce has on children. A new study has just been released that states that staying in a hostile and volatile relationship "for the kids" can be much more damaging than divorce itself. I have long since believed that this is the case, and I have heard time and time again that once a couple separates they are able to be better people and parents. However, what couples who are going through a divorce need to understand is----how they treat one another after the divorce will dictate how well their children deal with the divorce. No matter what couples who have children need to put their own issue and problems to the side and learn how to co-parent their children without the hostility and anger that may have led to their divorce. This study shows that staying in a bad relationship is worse than divorce, but it does not address whether or not a relationship that is bad during the marriage and remains bad after the divorce has more or less of a negative effect on children.

To read the article upon which this blog is based, see:

Money Woes Leads to Divorce

I think that most people know that one of the leading causes for divorce is money. What exactly is it about money that causes tension in relationships? The following article talks about the seven (7) money issues that are most likely to lead a couple to divorce. What I found most interesting is that one of the seven (7) things is issues that arise when a woman makes more than her husband. I find it funny that after all the strives that we have made as a society and the continuing role reversals in the traditional American family, experts still believe that men traditionally want to be the primary wage earners in a relationship.

To read the article about money woes see:

If They Can't Make, How Can We?

Al and Tipper Gore are the latest "celebrity" couple to be headed for divorce court. They were chastised for their overt display of affection towards one another while on the campaign trail and for outsiders there was no indication that their marriage was in any type of trouble. There are plenty of baby boomers who for a variety of different reasons end their long term marriages and there are questions about what this says about our society and the state of long term marriages in general. While it is unclear whether the same types of actions or inaction in a short term marriage cause the ultimate demise of a long term marriage, there is no question that divorce in long term marriages will change a tremendous amount of things, including what constitutes a "long term marriage". The following article addresses the questions raised by divorce late in life and how some people calling it quits cause other couples to question their own relationships.

Till Death Us Do Part?

I often pass over the opportunity to discuss celebrity divorce on this blog, however, Dennis Hopper's passing has brought up an interesting question about what happens if you have filed for divorce, but that divorce is not yet final when you or your spouse dies. Does your soon to be ex-spouse get more of your estate because you are still considered "married"? Dennis Hopper had a prenuptial agreement which states that his current wife, whom he filed for divorce from in January, will only be allowed to inherit any of his estate if they were married and living together at the time of his death. Therefore, the question in the probate court with respect to Hopper's estate will be whether the couple was living together at the time of Mr. Hopper's death. Every state is different when they are dealing with this issue, therefore, if you are in the process of a divorce, make sure that you update your will accordingly. Additionally, if you have concerns that your death may occur prior to the finalization of your divorce, motion the court to bifurcate your case to grant your divorce but reserve on the other issues so that your divorce can be granted. That way, if you were to die, you will die without a spouse and your former spouse will not inadvertently be entitled to more of your estate under probate/estate law rather than divorce/matrimonial law.

Caught Red Handed!!!

If you are caught having an affair and it ends up being the demise of your marriage, who is to blame? Can you sue the person or persons who revealed your secret to your spouse? What if the person who revealed your secret was actually a corporation? That is exactly what a Toronto woman is doing as a result of a cell phone company wrongfully combining the woman's private cell phone bill that was in her maiden name with that of her husband's. She is suing for breach of contract among other things and blames the cell phone company's wrongful act for her divorce and loss of job. While I believe that the breach of contract claim has merit due to the cell phone company's unilateral termination of her cell phone contract, I am not sure whether her claim that the cell phone company is responsible for her divorce has any merit at all. If you committed adultery and someone inadvertently reveals this to your spouse, should you be able to have any monetary recovery from that person or company that revealed your secret? What about personal accountability for your actions? Where do we draw the line? I am interested to hear any one's thoughts on this subject.

To read the article for which this blog is based, please see: