Fathers are playing actives role in their children's lives, more so than they did even 10 years ago. Despite the fact that more and more fathers are the primary care givers for their minor children, some people believe that there is still a bias in the courts towards the mother when determining who should be the primary residential parent. A recent case here in Florida addresses father's rights.
To read the article, see the following: http://mensnewsdaily.com/2007/10/24/elian-ii-campaign-update-fathers-rights-group-meets-with-dcf-cuban-father/
8 comments:
My brother is having the same issue. He is the primary caregiver (stipulated by both parents in court), his wife is a spousal abuser (the family investigator found credible evidence that she abused my brother), her family of origin is severely mentally ill (father tried to kill mother or mother so delusional believed father tried to kill mother - either one not a good environment for a 5 year old child) and yet a judge in Colorado appointed by Governor Ritter only four months ago allowed the abusive mother to move to another state with the child. Then my brother went to the state where they still had a home (they were trying to sell) and this same judge had him court ordered out of his OWN home in another state. In addition, the state of CO had no jurisdiction, but the judge back dated the dates in the court order, so that the court did - if he had not done so the court could not have given rights for the mother to move. In addition, CO supposedly has best interest of the child laws which the judge disregarded. The judge even disregarded the court appointed family investigators strong recommendation that the child NOT be moved. How can this happen? My brother chose to stay at home and take care of their child, the mother has been shown to be mentally ill with a propensity towards violence and the CFI stated this would be undue trauma for the child and yet none of that mattered! Then to top it off when you call the Governor's office they will tell you that while they put judges in office they will not review them. Well isn't that nice. The only review process will take months and since this judge has shown a complete disregard for the laws and ethics of CO, what damage will be done in the meantime. Just unbelievable that we say we want men to step up to the plate and then when they do we still allow the woman greater rights even when shown she is the much lesser parent.
Thank you
As a family law attorney whose practice emphasizes fathers rights, I am very sensitive to the problems faced by the woman posting this comment. All over the country, courts are struggling (or not) with how to include fathers in an equitable way when deciding custody cases. The court in my jurisdiction is probably the most progressive in my state. I can say this unequivocally, having experienced some heartbreaking results in other jurisdictions. Even so, the problem is not yet fully identified or acknowledged by the legal system. That is why I have chosen to focus my practice on fathers and their rights in marital dissolution. One of the most compelling forces that helped women obtain a more just place in the decision-making process of the courts was that they began to speak out forcefully in the 60's and 70's to get the recognition they needed. The same was true of the civil rights movement. What fathers need now is the same thing, women and men willing to speak up respectfully and firmly to insist that the legal system support the rights of children to strong, loving relationships with both parents after divorce. It is especially hard for women who decide to take this stand, as they are often seen as "troublemakers" when they do. But perhaps women's voices are especially needed in this area. I applaud the commentator for her commitment to speaking out to make our legal process more able to meet the needs of children.
blog at: http:/www.marylandfathersrights.com
i dont have a coment persay just a question.
Why is it that if you were never married with the mother that you basiclly have NO rights at all? I am going threw this right now with my ex and after i talked to attorney i pretty much have no rights. Even after she abandoned my daughter and left for another state, she is not stable nor does she work. now she has custody of my child after living in another state for a year and a have without any conntact with my daughter. i asked the cops to go get her for me after i droped her off at the place she's staying at one weekend and was told shes not going to let me have her back. not once did she pay me child support i never had help from the government such as medicade foodstamps cash assestance, but now she has filed all that for them both. she has been backeracked before but the lawyer i talked to pretty much said unless i can prove she is an unfit parent and my childs wellbeing is in danger i will not have custody at all. can anyone explain to me how this is JUSTICE??? i want whats best for my daughter
Married and divorced for many reasons. I am allergic to cats and she brought two into the home even though she knew. Told me that cats would stay and I would have to leave. Refused to go to work because she had to stay at home and take care of her mother. Problem, mother is a millionaire and could pay for her own care. Other issue, she brought mother into our home withour asking me. Since she was not working, she asked me to agree to a refinance. I did. She kept the checkbook and spent $120,000 on spas, her grandchildren,her mother, a step daughter (25) who followed her steps and decided not to work (bought the child a car and she still, 6 years later, does not have a driver's license. My name is on the mortgage. I finally had to leave. I got reamed. Lost my interest in home (it was hers before we got married) but in the 7 years of our marriage, I paid for everything including repairs and upgrades to the home. Home valued about $800,000. I wound up in this divorce, because she was not working, paying for her attorney, mine and everything else. Got screwed and also paying alimony and when I retire, she gets a piece of my retirement. She still does not work. She routinely pays the mortgage payments late and that is consistently screwing up my credit and preventing me from rebuilding my life. This is not right and do I have any options. I want my name off the mortgage.
Hello. And Bye.
Hire the best private investigator you can find and put her under surveillance. Also subpoena the school pick up and drop off records. This will prove she is either late, or someone else is picking up your child.
I am also facing the harsh treatment on fathers rights because i never married the mother of my child... she is now leaving ME because i just uncovered a year long, secret cocaine habit.. she doesn't want to stay with me now because she doesn't want to live under the scrutiny of her crimes... i am sick to my stomach over what is happening right now and DCF won't show up until 45 to 60 days from my call... from what i have read about cocaine (not too familiar with it at all), it leaves the blood within 72 hours... also from what i understand, even if i had her tailed by a Private investigator - had pictures of her buying and using cocaine, it would still not be enough to convince the courts to rule in my favor UNLESS she had my little girl in the car with her when she was doing it... i have spoken with about five different lawyers now and they all basically say my back is against the wall... now i need a pettition of paternity to stop her from leaving the state and to grant me the proper and legal rights as my daughters father... the KICKER in this all.. is that by doing so, not only will i have to spend $4,000 to actually get this petition in place, but then i'm liable for child support... i have no problems supporting my child - NONE - but whats to stop her form taking my hard earned cash - my working for my daughter - and snorting all that money away like she has been doing for the past year??
i have already vowed that once i get my head back on straight (i can not think or concentrate on anything BUT this disaster in my life), that i am joining a father rights group and fighting the absolute horrible treatment we fathers receive - even under such BLATANT circumstances.
My heart breaks a little more every day and it is so hard to stand up straight, let alone go on with the rest of each and every day... i am completely helpless and at her mercy now and this country, one that i have loved for so long, has found a way to let FATHERS down.
I am located in jupiter, my little girl is four and a half and is the love of my life - i have been lucky enough to work at home now for over two years and have been the primary caretaker since that time... i hate waking up - i hate going to sleep - i can't eat.. i'm completely broken and it's more or less because of the way this country views fathers.
it's HORRIBLE and a nightmare i am living.
for me,Sometimes even lawyers need lawyers...
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